Balancing Trauma Therapy & Parenting Neurodivergent Kids: A Personal Reflection

As a trauma therapist, I spend my days helping individuals heal from their most painful experiences. Using techniques like Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), I guide my clients through trauma recovery, helping them reframe their memories and emotions. However, when the workday ends and I step into my home, I take on a different role — that of a mom to two neurodivergent children.

Being both a trauma therapist and a neurodivergent parent has given me a unique perspective on healing. It can be overwhelming at times, but it’s also one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. Here’s what it’s like to juggle these roles, and what I’ve learned along the way:

1. Patience: A Skill That Translates Across Both Worlds

In my therapy practice, patience is a cornerstone. I guide my clients through emotional processes with care and understanding, recognizing that healing is not immediate. The same patience is required at home. Parenting neurodivergent children often calls for a level of understanding that goes beyond conventional parenting strategies. Every day is a learning experience, and I work hard to be present with my kids, allowing them the space they need to express themselves, even when it’s difficult.

The tools I use in therapy, like grounding techniques and regulating emotions, help me in my parenting too. Just as I support my clients through moments of emotional overwhelm, I use those same strategies to help my children feel heard and understood.

2. Empathy: Understanding Trauma From Multiple Angles

As a trauma therapist, I have an in-depth understanding of how trauma impacts people. This knowledge allows me to help my clients in a compassionate, trauma-informed way. But when it comes to my own kids, I’ve learned how important it is to approach parenting with the same level of empathy and compassion.

The reality is that neurodivergent children experience the world differently, and so their emotional responses and behaviors are often misunderstood. My work with trauma survivors has given me a heightened sense of empathy, which helps me understand my children’s struggles and communicate in ways that are supportive and validating.

3. Boundaries & Self-Care: Essential for Long-Term Success

In both therapy and parenting, boundaries are crucial. As a therapist, I’m often emotionally invested in my clients’ healing journeys, and it’s easy to feel drained. At home, I find myself needing to be emotionally present for my children while also taking care of my own needs. I’ve learned that self-care isn’t optional — it’s necessary.

Taking time to recharge and setting boundaries has allowed me to show up as my best self for both my clients and my kids. I’ve come to understand that without proper care and emotional boundaries, I can’t give the best of myself to anyone, including my family.

4. Trauma-Informed Parenting: Creating a Safe Space at Home

Being a trauma-informed therapist has influenced how I approach parenting. I recognize the importance of creating an environment where my children feel safe, valued, and accepted. This means acknowledging their unique needs and adapting my parenting approach to meet them where they are.

While therapy focuses on helping clients process past trauma, parenting is about creating an emotionally safe and supportive space in the present. I’ve learned that it’s just as important to foster a healing environment at home as it is in the therapy room.

5. The Journey is Non-Linear

One of the most important lessons I’ve learned in both my career and my parenting is that healing is not a straight path. There are setbacks, challenges, and moments of frustration. Some days are easier than others, both for my clients and for my kids. But ultimately, the journey is about progress — not perfection.

Every day is an opportunity to grow, learn, and heal. Whether I’m supporting a client through trauma recovery or helping my children navigate their own unique challenges, I know that healing takes time, and that’s okay.

Final Thoughts

Being both a trauma therapist and a neurodivergent parent is a delicate balance. It requires patience, empathy, and a lot of self-care. But I’m grateful for the insight these roles provide me into the healing process, and I am honored to be on this journey — both professionally and personally.

To all the parents out there juggling the challenges of work, therapy, and raising neurodivergent children: You are not alone. Healing is a shared experience, and we are all doing our best.

Conclusion

The experience of balancing these two important roles has been one of constant growth and reflection. It reminds me daily that healing, whether for myself, my children, or my clients, is an ongoing journey — and that’s something to celebrate.